A space I have long forgotten, hi once again.

It's been two years, a space I thought I'd never update again. Now where should I start..

In 2017, I resigned from BCH. My first full-time job, colleagues that I have never thought I'd be so attached to. On my very last day, i felt sad. Very sad. So.. I left BCH for a good 1.5 months, in search for jobs. Applied a few HR jobs to no avail. One day, a vendor messaged me to inform that his cheque was not signed. So being the very kind me, I texted RT about it.

It started from there that I knew they were struggling and wanted me back. Obviously I was happy about it because that'll mean I'll get to see my colleagues again! Long story cut short, she agreed to give me 2.3k, an increment of $300 so I agreed. However, the increment will come after my appraisal.

I was told that I had to work back the 1.5 months before I could do my appraisal and so it was supposed to be in November. I waited and soon it was November. No news from HR, no apprsaisal form handed to me. I had to chase HR several time before it was handed to me (such professionalism). Now the tricky part.. Arranging for an appraisal with the ever-so-busy boss. The appraisal never came up until April 2018. Mind you it was a 5 months gap. I was angry but there was a slight hope that I'll get my 2017 appraisal done, and few months later, get my 2018 appraisal done too.

NOPE. She decided to combine both years togethter. I was mad, very mad but I went along with it thinking she'll back pay me and that the $300 was secured. Come the next month, received the increment letter and was informed that my increment was $250. Now, I was fuming. Whatever happened to the $50 that she promised???

Whatever the case, I continued cos I needed the job and money.

School. Yes, you (me) read it right! Something that has been on my mind for the longest time. Never thought I'd continue uni but yes I dived right into it! For the past few years, I kept giving the excuse that I am not ready for school, I have no money, but I will continue uni. Little did I know.. that I will never be ready. I was never the study-material and obviously hated studying so why will I ever be ready?

Reading back from my post, I mentioned that I will most likely be headed to unisim (now called suss) but I guess the distance was the major drawback. It was too far from home and despite having a straight bus, the journey will prolly take me 1 hour back home and I haven't even calculated the time taken from my workplace to school. So now that suss is out, I started sourcing for private schools hopefully nearer to home and I decided that kaplan would be a good place due to the centrality. Then I proceeded on to look through the schools offered and decided to go with murdoch (cos that's the only school that sounded familiar to me and cos Qiwen and Ashley both graduated from there. Gave me some confidence).

Gathered Lisa with me with a plan to head down to school to get more info bout the course, about the schedules, and all that I wanted to know. Of course me being me, I did not expect myself to register for school the very next day! Reason being the next day was Kaplan's open house and there was gonna be a discounted registration fee and if I still need to consider, the school fees will increase in the next sem! So I told myself "I will never be ready no matter how much time I was given. So why not now? It's time." While I was convinced, Lisa had her doubts. Reason being she was unsure if she would like to take up HR and that the consultant turned out to be a Sales Consultant which made her doubt if she was just trying to push to the course to us just cos that was her job.

Come the next day, Lisa pulled out cos her mum and her then-boyfriend asked her not to unless she won't regret. I of course felt betrayed and angry lol. To make it up to me, she registered together but yes, she still pulled out. While I felt that way, I was determined to go through this alone. And hence, I started school. No regrets man!! I met Nicole, and since then we had been going through all trimesters together and honestly, without her I'd prolly be a lost sheep so many times! I feel we complement each other as she was good in areas that I am weak and vice versa. Thank god for her I have a companion for school and to also find out that we were pretty similar. We share many things, from our family, to our love for food and hotpot, to our frustrations, to her boyfriend, anything! Oh and this course I am taking is called Bachelor in Human Resource Management and Management - A double major. 2 years and I will be done in Aug 2020. YASSSS!! Can't wait to take up driving lessons after grad hehe! Lisa moved on to apply to SUSS, and a course she is interested in. Poor her gotta spend at least 3-4 years of studying but it will eventually be fruitful cos her cert will be considered a more 'premium' cert than mine since hers will be a local uni cert. Opportunity cost i guess!

Part time study is never easy and I had a taste of it in my first sem in school. Of course, having to squeeze 4 projects, and 2 exams, bi-weekly school days in a span of 3 months, while holding a full time job is crazy ok. That has got to be the toughest 3 months of my working life and what contributed most to the stress was actually work.

It was in 2018 when Weishan resigned, leaving me doing her work just cos I was the only one who knows how and without her part, I will not be able to do mine. HR had difficulty hiring a replacement so I had to cover her portion of work. As usual, my workload was already 100% or even more and to take on her work was another 50%. To make it worst, it was audit period and I had to deal with auditors from two companies, asking for so many documents which I had to find. Basically the moment I reach work, I had to search for their documents up till 5.30pm (when they leave) before I was able to continue with my daily task. And even before I could do my daily task, I had to do Weishan's part if not I cannot continue. During that point, a new colleague came (who was suppose to help do Weishan's part and take abit of my stuff cos I was already overloaded) so I had to spend more time mentoring her. She had 101 problems which I had to answer. Imagine coming to you (when you are already fking busy) every 5 minutes to ask things which I had already explained. WOW IMAGINE MY PAIN. Thinking of it now.. How did I even tank this shit job without even thinking bout resigning?

It was until my parents could not take it and mummy gave me the ultimatum to resign or she'd go confront my boss.. I was basically leaving the office at 10.30pm everyday except days when I had classes and I STILL could get my work done. I came home feeling empty cos my parents were sleeping and I would not see them until the weekends. Oh, weekends was burnt too, to chiong my reports which I could not finish till I had to take leave prior to the deadline to churn out 10 bibliographies. It was so tough I wanna cry. & so.. I tendered, without any back-ups. No jobs, no plans.

Went for a couple of interviews and one of them was Eatigo, a start-up. The HR manager was keen on hiring me but I rejected cos they could not wait another month for me. They needed someone who can start immediately hence, with much despair, I gave up the job. Feeling so down, I sorta gave up searching for jobs. Pei pei started a business and needed someone to help with administrative work and at times, some delivery. Salary offered was $1k a month and there was no fixed day or hours of work. I go as and when needed. Sounds good, so I took up.

To my horror, she was such a messy person. Throwing important documents everywhere, the office quickly became a war zone, and slowly to a warehouse. I knew it was an interim job because the little voice in me knew that I was meant for better jobs, bigger companies. There are so much I have yet to learn and explore and I do not wish to be cooped up in this one-man office. It wasn't easy as I had to be early to set-up wagon sales in malls, replenishing stocks in shops, and juggling with a messy boss who have no concept of financial management. Very quickly, funds were insufficient and she was seen topping up the business account with her own. Struggling, she decided to cut my salary and told me I would be paid on an ad-hoc basis when I was needed to do ibanking. I felt a betrayed yet relieved. Betrayed cos she knew I needed the money to support my expenses (SP bills, town council, HP bills, and some allowance), relieved cos she was doing illegal stuff like contributing CPF to people who are not working under her just so she could get herself an EP.

Of course I started job hunting again and after 10 over applications, I felt so so so upset because they were either turning me down, or left me hanging. Anyway, decided to head to Hong Kong and enroute to Guangzhou with mummy in February (even tho im very broke) cos she has a HK friend and she wants to visit too.

Lao niang fell very sick on my second day there due to lack of sleep cos I was chionging my report in hopes that I finish it before I can enjoy my trip. The whole trip was wonderful and we absolutely love the cold weather! We weren't prepared for the dip of temperature in gz tho.. We were told it'll be around 16 - 18 degrees but it started raining on the day we arrive and never stopped lol. Temperatures dipped to 11 degrees and with my fever, I felt the cold excruciating zzz. Would like to visit there again but to go everywhere by taxi cos it's a waste of time squeezing the train with the locals.

So... I was the idiot who went back to bch AGAIN (third time liao) to work part-time. Can you imagine I was broke to the stage of accepting a part-time from a job I left twice???? Really no face already but I was really short of money and a part-time pay of $10/hr is good. Decided to commit thrice a week while balancing school and enjoying life. Went back and many things has changed. As I have left, AP went haywire and RT had to re-arrange everything to her understanding and control. Oh, and so I knew from Bev that my seat was taken but never did I know that I would get such a throw-face seat... Uncle Teo's table. Facing the wall....... I was really upset and disappointed but for the money..

Come end April, it was our annual family trip to BKK. It was a wonderful trip as usual but I brought so little baht cos.... I AM BROKE lol. Thought the left over thai baht from last year was enough to last (cos i told myself there's nth much to get) but ended up having to withdraw money from the ATM at a cut-throat rate and best yet, i forgotten to take my card. Goodbye to my limited SG50 passion debit card lol. Didn't realise I lost the card until I was back in Sg.

On my last night in BKK while having my foot massage, I decided to check my email and woohoo I scored for an interview with ComfortDelGro. I applied for a position called HR Officer (Benefits Admin) and it basically covers insurance, leaves, medical, etc etc. I felt that it was not a role with much exposure and did not really want it but decided to give it a shot anyway since i'll most likely be rejected. I applied it prior to the BKK trip and did not give much thoughts about it since I have been checking my Jobstreet app more than my email and did not get any notifications on any companies viewing my profile.

So yada yada... I went for the interview and thought that was it. I'm never getting the job cos I didn't think i fared well for it and i just kinda did not like the work environment cos it felt too quiet and serious. It was so corporate-style with high partitions that you cannot see anyone at all. It was dead quiet with only keyboard typing sounds and of serious work conversations. It was a panel interview with three interviewers and honestly, they did not look very pleased with my answers.

GUESS WHICH BITCH GOT THE JOB TWO WEEKS LATER?? I was as usually being the family-daughter, cooking dinner for the fam when I got the call form CDG about taking the interview to the next step. During which I did not really dare be too happy yet as the person over the phone did not specifically tell me that I got in. We then proceeded to discuss about my pay and with much enthusiasm, I was greeted with disappointment. Bch's payslip screwed my future pay big time. The way bch plays around with the variable components made my basic salary very very low - $1k and CDG calculates salary base on my basic salary. LOL wtf I was very upset and tried getting my point across to the person but no choice, I was only offered $2.3k. It was $200 lower than expected but it's okay cos I have no experience in HR and was actually willing to get back $2.25k.Was told that bonus is good and AWS is included too. So to sum it up, annually, the increment from bch is actually 23% increase. I took the job!!

On the day of signing the contract (4 days prior to start work), I was told that they needed someone urgently at another business unit (BU) called taxi business which is located at Sin Ming and if i am able to help out for between 3 and 6 months. I was reluctant but what can i say.... So i agreed.

Reported to work on 10 June, I was asked to report to Braddell. Spent the whole day reading collective agreements and policies to come to realise that... I was hired under CDG Corporation, but was seconded to SBS Transit and my benefits will follow the former. W.T.F. That means that whatever benefits under sbs like free bus rides, I will not be entitled to. ZZZ. Come the next day, Angeline from recruitment (HC) brought me to taxi office. This was when I realised, I actually love the office! it was a cozy little room with few tables, partitions were low yet retained some privacy, and colleagues were so nice!!

Fast forward three months, I enjoyed everyday at work with nice colleagues and nice boss!! But.. good things don't last. I was told to go back to Braddell and report work on September.. I felt so sad on my last day I even cried lol wtf ikr. I guess cos I felt very loved in taxi and I was really afraid of what's to come.. Evonne tried putting up a request for me to stay in taxi but to no avail so I had no choice but to leave.

Started my first day back in Braddell with a desk right at the front of the office but it didn't matter cos it just meant nearer access for me to run to the toilet (wow so positive hor). Colleagues were surprisingly nice!! Then again, I sat there whole day doing nothing. Second day, I made my way down to Vicom ALL. BY. MYSELF. it was far.. very far at teban gardens crescent. I knew nobody and no one had the time to accompany me down from Braddell so I had to thick skin abit go by myself. Forced myself to head there in the morning so that I can have lunch with them and to bond cos since i will be heading there more often, I ought to know them better.

2 weeks has passed and it felt like I've been working at braddell and traveling to and fro vicom for a month lol. It is even more tiring now that a new term of school has started. But finally after 2 weeks, I feel comfortable with my vicom colleagues as well as my braddell colleagues. Just hope things will get better from here and school will be a breeze too!!

As the title suggests, yes it's the end of a chapter in my life. That's a little exaggerating HAHA but yup, i have left bch. My last day was 14th July 2017.

It was a bitter-sweet farewell. Bitter cos i'll miss my colleagues so much. They are such nice people despite the dramas and some politics. Sweet cos I do not need to deal with shit like working on the 1st, and 2 consecutive weeks before cny. Also, my work need not be audited anymore~

Plans? To look for another job (keeping my fingers crossed), a better paying job. This time round, i should always remind myself not to jump into a job so quickly just cos i need the money. i have to have patience.

Study? Well, prolly until i've settled for a new job for a year before deciding. Most likely going for unisim as it is now a govt school and i just knew from ange that they have a direct bus home. YES AH!

Cheers! I'll be back for more updates!

Very well. Been away for months and reading back the previous posts, guess i should be updating abit.

I have been with bch for 1.1 years now and basically nothing much has changed with regards to my portfolio except for a lil more workload since xingxian has left. yes, cxx left. so soon after cny, pt left, followed by cxx in june, and soon it'll be wy's turn in sept. i'm left all alone...... i wonder when will it be my turn.

had my first appraisal and boss has been happy with my job performance for the past year and i'm guessing there will be an increment tho idk how much it will be. getting bored with my portfolio already and requested for a job rotation by learning pt's stuff (idk if this is suicide but for the sake of the experience, endure!) my current portfolio is basically logical. by that i mean even a temp staff is able to do my stuff. it's just administrative stuff which i think 1 year of doing is more than enough. not sure when i'll be able to learn new stuff but i hope to be able to leave this company by next year.

i am hoping to leave after cny but it'll also depend on the economy. it has been very bad recently and i'm sure there are many who are still job hunting. sigh pie.

so i've previously mentioned that i had been receiving lots of love and attention.... well i guess i was wrong. i did not actually like the attention as it was too much for me to handle after a certain period of time. we were quarreling every now and then since may..... not sure how i should continue from here as idk what to feel. can't seem to pen down my thoughts. ok bye. all is well.

"他喜欢的你也学着关注喜欢，愿意每天看到他。蝎子很简单。他们会耍赖，也会顽皮，喜欢动画片，边看边笑，笑起来足以融化冰山。天蝎座怀念一切值得记忆的东西，但很少有人知道他们还怀念。

One of the more accurate ones I've came across thus far. Well.. Not too sure what to feel now. Been receiving lots of love from someone lately and I feel that it's getting a little out of hand. (I guess I'm partly to be blamed for reciprocating) No matter how much I've been denying it, it's true that I've been shaken. But it's all wrong.... Idk how or what to feel. More like I'm just going with the flow towards the wrong direction. Idk if I am reading too much into it or what but it feels good to be loved and cared for.

All those sweet words put a smile to my face but at the same time made me cringe cos I know it's wrong. But I like the attention, the care and concern, noticing every of my details and the words I've said. Feels very comfortable to be with this person and all appreciate all the time spent. Sigh. 

It's CNY day 1 today and everything feels as per normal. No mood for CNY at all. All I wna do is to lie in bed the whole day. Don't even give a hoot how many red packets I have collected.

Worked 3 consecutive weeks prior to CNY and I must say it was a grueling period. 9am every single day with no fixed timing off work. It's been my 7th month with the company and I have already broken my record of knocking off late. Reaching home at 12+ and reporting to work again the next day. Makes me wonder how did I even survive the first two weeks. 

Anyway, this terrible period is over and it's back to 8.30am again. Was expecting to get more days aside from the normal cny day 1&2 off after working like dogs for the past three days but nope. Selfish boss follows the friggin calendar. Okay lor you win. Sucks but what to do sigh I don't even know what to feel anymore. All I am hoping is to be able to end early. Nothing more. Work is never-ending and I do hope that everyone understands that. Morale is like hitting deficit already yet I have to drag my ass to work with a question in mind - What time will I be able to end tonight? 

Got my first bonus payout and well, I find it quite surprising to be receiving this amount since I expected nothing more than $500. I bet others got more since mine's pro-rated. Despite my family agreeing that it's a small sum, it's better than nothing. 

P.s Daddy has been working for 1 month in his new job already. Hope all will be okay for him. I know this job is physically stressful but hope he takes good care of his body and push on.